Washing versus cooking

A friend, who's married with two little girls under five, finally tired of having the 'who's washing up' conversation and so came up with a foolproof plan to avoid the post-dinner, your-turn tension. The couple sat down and each listed from one-to-three the things they hated most about washing up/ cooking, and general chores involving the family meal. Then they listed the three things they knew were chores, but really didn't mind doing once they thought about it. Then they swapped notes. They could finally work out a strategy that saw them share the jobs, but not necessarily despise doing them every single night. This only works if you both agree to do it, and take it seriously. Do it over a glass of wine, make sure you're both in a good mood to begin with, and do it on the weekend or during the day so the jobs-in-question are not staring you in the face.  

Hate, hate, hate doing

Him: washing up pots and pans; unpacking the dishwasher; mopping, sweeping or vacuuming the stupid floor.

Her: Getting my hands all dry and pruny from washing up endless cutlery, plate, bowl and glass; making the peppermint tea after dinner (I want to relax, finally); scraping all the leftovers into containers.

Actually don't mind if I'm honest

Him: Cooking dinner (and tidying up as I go); packing dishwasher; washing everything except pots and pans. 

Her: Cooking dinner; wiping all the benches and mopping floor of kids' crumbs and cook's spills; washing up the big things. 

Neither minded cooking dinner, but since she works from home, she would cook dinner during the week and he would cook dinner on the weekends as well as make their coffees and fruit salad or porridge in the morning before work. During the day, she would unpack the dishwasher from the night before and pack in the breakfast dishes. After dinner, he would scrape all the leftovers into containers and then wash up all the little things (glasses, cutlery, plates, bowls), or he'd stack the dishwasher, while she wiped down the table, benches, and swept the kitchen floor (with kids about it was generally pretty messy). Then, she would refresh the washing up water and do the big cooking pots, pans, and the big serving platters if necessary. Meanwhile, he'd make their nightly peppermint tea, get the cups out and find any dessert or chocolate or whatever they might have with it. They'd meet on the sofa, knowing the jobs were all done and they could relax together. Best of all, they didn't have to ruin the night with the nightly conversation about whose turn it was to do the washing up.